A Teensy Weensy Disclosure

So I feel like a tool at this point. While most of you are probably like, "I wanna hear more!" I'm sure there are those who are like, "give it a rest for cryin' out loud!" Either way, I respect that. Here's the thing. At least 75% of the people who have contacted me in person or on the 'puter have expressed how well they truly believe I did and can't wait to see me crush the game and show Pat and Vanna how it's done come March 2nd. I gotta say, I've never been in this bizarre position (obviously), but it has caused this weird feeling of anxiety that I never expected.

People see how happy I am, and how enthusiastic I am when I explain my crazy day in LA last week and from that, they infer that I won big time so how can I NOT be beaming? I mean, that's fair, I can see how that would be apparent, but whew, it's exhausting to think about how everyone will respond come March 2nd. So for my own sake and sanity and level of anxiety, I am going to officially announce that I didn't win "big money". Now this can mean anything, I know, but just don't go into the show believing and expecting, without a shadow of a doubt, that I dominated. Because I did not.

There. Now you know. Now you won't go into the show with full anticipation of my being surrounded by flying confetti, then finish watching the show with total disappointment because the small colorful squares did not land in my hair and ruin my makeup. Man, doing something like this (and okay also being a Facebooker...guilty...) certainly makes me vulnerable...in front of everyone!

Lastly, I'd like to lovingly blame my total satisfaction in life and in how I did, to the knowledge I have in Jesus, knowing that there's a heck more to life than money and trips. Thank goodness this is the case! The day after the taping I ran into a girl at the hotel who had played in a different game and ended up going to the bonus round. Her face was all red and puffy; she had certainly had a rough night. I totally hurt for this girl and wished she could hold tight to the fact that our worth is not found in a stupid game show (okay I know it's not stupid, but in the light of things, I mean, com'n, it definitely is).

So, in conclusion:

1. Thank you for your confidence in me!

2. You don't need to stop being confident in me by any means, but you should stop expecting me to have won with lots of digits in the winning amount of money.

3. But don't feel bad either, because I loved the experience and that makes me a winner (stitch that on a pillow and place it in your living room immediately) in and of itself.

4. My enthusiasm is partly because of YOUR enthusiasm toward my experience, and being overwhelmed by all your support, but also hugely because God rocks and my purpose here is not to win millions and go on trips. Although wouldn't that be fun?

XO!